Too Many Thoughts

It's definitely 1:15 am. And I'm wide awake. I'm trying to make my eyes tired by looking at my computer screen! :) haha

So I'm done with finals. Why am i still awake? No need to worry anymore or lose sleep about how I'm not studying enough or what not... I'm stinkin' done! Well... let's see... what is on my mind.

1. Colorado. I'm moving to Colorado in less than a week! Crazy! I'm so excited but at the same time rather nervous. I mean I handle change really well... i know i will love it... but it's the unfamiliarity of everything about going out there! I've never been to Colorado. So simple things like packing details are stressing me out. Why? I don't know. I'm excited to spend some time, quality time, with the Lord this summer. My time at the camp is going to be spent serving the families that come... which is awesome! I know i am going to learn so much while im there! My prayer is that God would break me down and build me back up... more in the likeness of his Son. That i would come back changed. So pray for that too! :) 

2. I didn't get the Hollywood internship. Good thing right... I mean I'm going to Colorado! :) But this truly showed me the hand of God in my life. As much as i wanted the internship in Hollywood... God wanted me elsewhere! Which is awesome, because he gave me the peace and joy about following his lead... wherever that meant. I guess he meant Colorado. :)

3. I'm having to pack up my apartment... knowing full well that when i return in august i will be returning as an RC! Though i am super stoked about this opportunity... i'm unsure of what that exactly looks like! I'm also praying that God would prepare me for that this summer.

4. and lastly... though there is a lot more on my mind. I'm thinking about my Popi and my Nana. My Popi is doing well... but I don't want to miss out on him getting better! Like when i leave, life in California will continue, just without me. I'm scared of missing something huge. Also, my Nana is going through chemo right now... im also scared of missing something huge in her life. Or not being a part of the family who's fighting this alongside her. I don't want to be the one family member who leaves when so much stuff is going on. Though i know this is where God has me for the summer... it's a tension I'm thinking about. 

Hence the lack of sleep! :) Who could sleep with all this nonsense (and more) in their head. Yie... ok... 1:30... maybe i'll try again!! Good nite!